Three Things to Do When You’re in a Hot Mess (Holiday Edition)

11/12/2021

From time to time, we all find ourselves in a hot mess. . . especially during the Christmas holidays.

The truth is, God didn’t create us or redeem us to be a hot mess.

God has created us in His image (Genesis 1-2) which means that we are more complex than we could ever imagine. We have emotions that feel brokenness and wholeness. We have curious minds that wonder and seek understanding (“why?”). We have lives that ache and long for connection.

So, in all of this beautiful complexity that we can humanity, here are three things God gives us permission to do when you’re in a hot mess this holiday season (and anytime!).

You have permission to ugly cry.

It’s OK for ugly tears and laughing until your side hurts to co-exist.

Take a note from Joy and Sadness, themselves.

God gives us both joy and sadness to feel and to own. So, cry away. Your tears are given by God to express your sadness just as much as your giggles are given by God to express your joy.

You have permission to care for yourself.

I was recently reminded that in moments of crisis and trauma, before tending to others, you must first care for yourself.

Here is what caring for yourself might look like:

Get enough sleep
Say “yes” to really important things, first.
Schedule “do nothing” days before committing to events and activities
Drink enough water and eat well - as in healthy
Ask somebody to help you with something, everyday… even if it’s with something you can really do by yourself. God has made us to “do life” together - not apart.
Help somebody in an ordinary way, everyday. It truly does change the way you see people and the opportunities “as you go”.

Bethany Dearborn Hiser says “taking care of ourselves is essential for our well-being as beloved children of God, allowing us to be effective and resilient, loving people instead of using those we serve to support or enhance our own sense of worth”.

You can check out Bethany’s entire article from Christianity Today, here.

You have permission to find your way back to Jesus.

Between the hot messes and ugly tears combined with all the feels, it’s easy to lose sight of Jesus.

The good news is that Jesus has never lost sight of you.

These five responses may help you as you find your way back to Jesus:

Read your Bible - you can start with this story.
Check out a message at oslc.com/watch
Spend time in prayer (even if it’s yelling and screaming at God… God can take it)
Talk to somebody about finding your way back to Jesus by completing a Connection Card. (Make sure you check the box, “I would like to connect with somebody about following Jesus”.)
Don’t go at it alone. Who will you invite into this sacred space of your life to help you find your way?

What have you found helpful when you're in a hot mess during the Christmas holiday season? Let me know at [email protected].

Meet Pastor Tim

Tim Bayer has served as Our Savior's Lead Pastor since September 2019. He also serves as an Adjunct Instructor at Concordia University - Irvine, a National Leadership Facilitator and Resource, and with the Northwest District of the Lutheran Church - Missouri Synod.

Tim studied sociology, psychology, and theology prior to earning his M.Div at Concordia Seminary - St. Louis. He also is a candidate for an Ed.D (ABD) in Transformational Leadership.

He is married to Beth and they have three children. Together, they enjoy exploring the outdoors, experiencing culture, and pizza and movie nights.

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Three Things to Do When You’re in a Hot Mess (Holiday Edition)

Meet Pastor Tim

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